If you’ve been acting as a caregiver for a loved one, and have come to the decision to bring on additional caregiving help in the home, you’ve already taken a big step. Now, you’ll want to prepare for the addition of in-home carer.
No matter how welcome the additional help may be, it is a big change to have a relative stranger in your home. Even if the carer is a known and trusted person, you may want to give some thought to carer-proofing your house.
Here are the types of things you’ll want to consider before your new in-home carer starts.
Get your space ready
Make one room or one area of the house “yours.” This is a place where you can find sanctuary from all the activities in the house. You can also keep items that you would prefer others not have access to there, whether your private journals or your favorite coffee cup. Ideally, there will be a door you can close, and maybe nice music, a yoga mat, or whatever brings you some peace.
Other people, no matter how well intentioned, are probably not going to take as good care of your items as you do.
Anything that needs dry cleaning or special handling (the top shelf of the dishwasher only, for example) is probably going to meet an untimely end if left out.
Consider replacing delicate items with sturdy, washable items.
Secure valuable and sentimental items
- Put your valuables away, or at least out of sight. Getting a small home safe or a safety deposit box at your bank is also a choice. No reason to tempt fate.
- Password protect your computers. If you keep paper documents such as bank statements or even credit card statements, you may want to put them in a locked box or remove them from the premises.
- Put away treasured items, whether valuable or not. If Grandmother’s cup has sentimental value, put it away or move it into your private space.
Carve out special zones for caregiver tasks
If the caregiver will be taking in your mail, specify a spot for them to put it so you can sort it and retrieve the important items.
Put up a magnetic whiteboard or corkboard, where you and the carer can leave things like notes, receipts, and reminders. This would supplement more formal and trackable communication like email, but ensures smaller things don’t get lost.
Get insurance in order
If the carer will be driving your car, make sure your car insurance covers other drivers. It is also a good idea to have AAA or some other roadside assistance program. Be sure to put the registration, insurance card, and assistance information in the car.
Review your homeowner’s or renter’s insurance to verify that it will cover persons working in your home. Often an additional policy rider is necessary.
Prepare yourself mentally
Having a relative stranger in your space consistently and for long stretches of time takes some getting used to. In the best cases, chemistry with the carers is good and some rapport is built; at minimum, courtesy and clarity will be sufficient.
You don’t have to be friends with the people in your house; in fact, it may be better to keep things on a more professional basis. If the details are important to you, then be very clear about your expectations for the caregiver: what do you want them to do, how you want them to do it, and when do you want them to do it? On the other hand, you may be content to give broad instructions and leave more to their discretion. Or, in some matters you might care about the details and in others not.
Your personal style can guide your communications, so long as there is a mutual understanding between you and the carer. It is always a good idea to have the carer repeat your instructions back to you so everyone is on the same page.
Get your mind and soul around the loss of privacy and control. If you are living in the same space as the patient and the carers, then loss of privacy is the biggest issue. You can ask the carer to give you and your patient privacy at times when you just want to hang out with them. If the carers are using a baby monitor to keep track of the patient when they are not in the room, you can unplug it or turn it around. If you don’t unplug it and only turn it around, the sound will still be on.
The in-home caregiver will be present when you, your family, your inner circle, and the patient are interacting. Interactions may not always be ideal or even pleasant. We are all just human. The important thing is being present to the patient and the situation. If you can let go of the worry that you are being judged by this new person, it is helpful. They are also human and bring all their past experiences to the situation. They may be more empathetic than you realize, or they may not be. Try not to let it matter—there are more important things to tend to.
If you are not living in the place where the caregiving is taking place (like your parents’ house), then loss of control may be the biggest issue. Clear instructions will help, as well daily reports from the carers. Texts and ease of sending photos have made remote management easier, but things may still not be done exactly as you would have done them.
Try to pick your battles; decide what is really important and focus on that; and let the rest go. Carers bring their own way of doing things, their own personal and cultural background, even language, which may be different from yours. Google translate and autocorrect can make for some slightly hilarious, albeit at times frustrating, reports. A sense of humor is helpful. Even if whatever it is is not done the way you had hoped, it still might be done.
You have now figured out what your needs are and given some thought to how to be ready for help in the home. The next question is: What type of professional in-home caregiver do you need?
